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April 19, 2006
Office Co-Workers
I've only tried to write about this now four times. This time though, I'm determined. Originally I was going to write about the Karpman Drama Triangle, then it was that same thing, but with regards to work, then I was just going to write about people who always think their life is the worst or they're the busiest or the most stressed (generally those who constantly play the victim role in that triangle), and now I'm going to just talk about people at work in general and the roles they play.
Lots of things have been able to point out many of the office quirks. I'll narrow it down to the following few choices:
- Dilbert - the original. Everybody is convinced that the author, Scott Adams, actually works at their place of business
- Office Space - Don't ask me how the creators of Beavis and Butthead broke office satire out into the wide world (best viewed when edited for TV)
- The Office - the British, turned American, sitcom sadly hits on so many truths that I personally feel that I've worked for Michael Scott my whole career
Even though I didn't write about what I originally wanted, I still feel that the office is filled with people and quirks that deserve mention.
The victim is one that has drawn my attention recently, since I have come in more frequent contact with one over the past few weeks. Their life is so tough. They're so busy. Everything was due yesterday. Their work is so important. They're so annoying. For the most part it seems that they tend to forget that the rest of us have just as much, if not more work than they do. We all have a life in addition to what we do at work (except for those who sleep under their desk over night). Many times these same victims are the ones who talk the most, in an effort to seek additional pity for the rough life they lead. Unfortunately they also tend to be the recipient of most of my rudeness, and the recipient of the least of my listening time.
Topper, a great character created in Dilbert, always can top your story/experience/life. You may have met the President of the United States in the Oval Office, but they claim to have met 3 of the Presidents while receiving congressional medals of honor for various acts of duty that they performed during in the past 3 World Wars while they authored novels and coined famous quotes and originated the peanut butter and jelly sandwich. It might not be to that extreme, but if you had a bad day yesterday, theirs was worse. If you happy about a raise, they're thrilled with theirs and their bonus.
I was told once that the difference between butt-kissing and brown-nosing was depth perception. Either way, these people are the bane of my existence. Most of these people are two-faced as they appear to the boss to be practically perfect in every way (not to be confused with Mary Poppins, who truly is), yet are flawful (nice double meaning there). I'm hopeful that most bosses are keen to the deception, but my recent encounters have shown that although they may be keen to it, they like it, and therefore reward it.
Stemming from conversations with the new person with whom I share a cubicle, this is the product of my thoughts on this subject… for now.
Reminds me of that DirectTV commercial.
"Good news! Just got promoted!"
"Better news! I just got DirectTV."
I have similar feelings about perma-victims. Hard to handle well. We're all afraid of the ME Monster.
It's also pretty humorous to see these individuals deal with technical issues.
They use blame-filled phrases like:
"The computer keeps..."
"It won't let me..."
It's hard for us to accept that sometimes it's just user error.
Quite true and quite funny. I think we should declare biological warfare on all office "Toppers."
I will hereby begin this war with steady and unrelenting crop dusting passes at "Topper's" cube/desk. I will follow this up with giving their email out to every site that I visit so as to inundate their inbox with SPAM. I will put tape on their optical mouse. And, as my 'coup de grace', I think we should all endeavor to entomb at least one office supply of theirs in gelatin.
Let the war begin!!!
Hey, there's nothing wrong with being a VICTIM!!! (OK, so apparently the TRP training went in one ear and out the other. Would it help to mention that I do have the TRP OATH on my office wall?? Does this site award points??)
HAHAHA...I just realized that my double use of ?? and !! will probably annoy Pedro. If you want to call and give me the speech on redundancy, please feel free. I could use a little excitement now and then. ;)
There is no problem if you are truly a victim. Robbed at the front door of your house? Sure, complain away, that's fine. Complaining because you have crappy time management skills and work too much? I Couldn't care less.
And yes, your usage of punctuation, and capitalization is annoying, and you know better (not to mention, fairly off-topic), but whatever.
I walked on the moon...
I'm a huge fan of Dilbert and The Office (I still have not seen Office Space). I agree with all of your observations of "victims," "toppers," and butt-kisser/brown nosers. Each are annoying and can be found in every office. Do you fall into any of these categories? If not, how would you classify your office character?
I'm not any of these, which is why I have beef with them. I'd say that I fit more into the "question everything possible that won't get you fired" category. It seems that so many things are done in the office without a reason besides that they've always been done that way. Until that is brought to somebody attention that matters, it keeps happening.