Longbored Surfer

2005.08.14 Hospital Visitors

Having babies is not an easy thing to do. I am going by my wife's words because I am not in any position to say things like, "contractions feel like a cramp and a muscle flex at the same time." Or "it's just like a really big bowel movement!" I am only there for the moral support and encouragement. I take orders, and that's all right for me because I am the father and fathers don't have babies.

In my role as a father I do have liberty to set the ground rules for the hospital stay. I set rules to protect my wife and me, because I have high anxiety. My number one, and only, rule is:

"Please don’t bring your children when visiting us in the hospital."

There are many reasons for this.

  1. I don't want your kid pushing the Nurse Button.
  2. Sit Down!
  3. I don't want your child touching mine. "WASH YOUR DIRTY HANDS!"
  4. Don't play tag in the hallway.
  5. Don't touch my camera, I'm not going to show you the pictures every time I take a new one.
  6. SIT DOWN!
  7. Don't sit on the bed, let's just stay away from the bed all together.
  8. No, it is not safe to have 20 people in a room that is 10x12.
  9. Stop playing with the rubber gloves.
  10. The curtain is not a robe.

I have seen some of these actions in hospital rooms, but mostly daydream of the worst possible thing. I wish I didn't have anxiety, but I do and since I'm kind of a patient, with my wife and child, I can tell you to stay away.

Originally posted by sammyp79 on pablonoesta.com

Tag(s): soap_box

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