Longbored Surfer

Blog entries tagged "soap_box"

2006.09.22 Where it Counts

In the 5th grade I got in a fight with a kid named Chris Powers. I won't go into the details of our friendship obviously gone wrong. For whatever dumb reason, lately I've been thinking about a comment he made after the fight.

"You got me in my weak spot!"

"Well duh, that's why I won, and you lost."

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2006.09.19 HP's Photo Slimming Effect

I understand that we as a nation are overweight. I know they've made movies about it that can make you sick as you watch. The Atkins craze was enough to make me want to hit somebody. The Special K diet is out there and available to all you cereal junkies (a serving size has never looked so small… let me assure you). The Triplets of Bellville portray all Americans as walking balloons - and not the kind used to make poodles and swords (it's a great movie, by the way).

Hewlett Packard, in case they didn't have enough to worry about, has now endorsed obesity in our culture by adding a slimming effect to digital cameras, so you can just click a couple buttons, and the camera will automatically adjust the photos to make the people in your photos skinnier. Although I can agree that it would behoove quite a few of us (me included) to lose a pound or two, endorsing doctored photos to make people feel less self-conscious about their weight is ridiculous. Afterall, Katie Couric did it, why can't we?

2006.09.06 An Introvert

A month or so ago I re-took a personality test for work. They like to use these things to fit us into different groups and so they can “know” how to better work with us. The test that my employer prefers is the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator ®. It's the second time I've taken this same test. The officiators claim that it isn't likely to change very drastically between tests. Although the results weren't anything astounding to me, one of the most intriguing items was that it pegged me as an introvert.

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2006.08.30 Pawner and Pawnee

Although you can take something to a pawn shop and they'll buy that item for a less-than-fair price, that's not what I'm talking about here. I'm referring to the times when you pawn something off onto somebody else. In this case you're essentially suckering them into taking something that is potentially less-than-desirable. Following this logic, you're the pawner and they're the pawnee. Doesn't that speak poorly for the Pawnee? Despite my attempts to discover the root of their name as a tribe, I was unsuccessful. If people pawned off anything decent onto them, maybe they could now sell their stuff on eBay and make a buck or two… whatever.

2006.08.25 You MUST Fill this Out

Recently I was on a flight where a form was required to be filled out. It was clearly communicated that this form was not an option, and that they would shortly be collecting the completed forms. Oh, and by the way, no we don't have anything for you to use to fill this form out. If this were a harsher world, and they had set a 2 minute deadline, and the consequence for not filling out that form was death, yet they wouldn't provide anything to anybody for helping in filling out that form… they would have had a mutiny on their hands. People scrambling to get something to write with, or just pricking their fingers for a new writing tool. I'm taking this a little far, but I thought it was a little harsh, "You must fill this out, but we won't help you do that at all. T minus 10, 9, 8…"

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