Links tagged "reference"
I read this article a while ago, and was initially thrown off by the title, and even the opening line. I proceeded to be completely drawn in by his message. Despite having read it months ago, I thought of it again recently, and figured I should share it.
In marriage, losing is letting go of the need to fix everything for your partner, listening to their darkest parts with a heart ache rather than a solution. It's being even more present in the painful moments than in the good times. It's finding ways to be humble and open, even when everything in you says that you're right and they are wrong. It's doing what is right and good for your spouse, even when big things need to be sacrificed, like a job, or a relationship, or an ego. It is forgiveness, quickly and voluntarily. It is eliminating anything from your life, even the things you love, if they are keeping you from attending, caring, and serving. It is seeking peace by accepting the healthy but crazy-making things about your partner because, you remember, those were the things you fell in love with in the first place. It is knowing that your spouse will never fully understand you, will never truly love you unconditionally—because they are a broken creature, too-and loving them to the end anyway.
It's a great article, and certainly has some pointers for how I could improve as a spouse. #
Susan puts out there a couple points that rang true with me - put a stop the need for constant group work (it's okay at times, but it doesn't need to be the norm). Also, we should each take time to go to our own proverbial wilderness to have our own revelations, or deep thinking.
Personality-wise, I've tested as both an introvert and extrovert (and each time I felt like it described me well). With that in mind, Susan introduced a word to me which describes me well - ambivert. This somewhat temperamental existence doesn't always sit well with my extroverted friends or family members. I'm curious about Susan's fairly new book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking. I'll add it to my list of books to read or listen to. #
"Instead of sitting at your computer, and looking at books, go...and sit there. The way to get an interesting idea is to go to the source. Stay there until you have thought of something interesting about [it]. Then, listen to that idea and it will design itself." - Bob Gill #
Although one of the hosts can be extremely tangential and talk like he's had too much caffeine, he seems very well-read on the topic of productivity, and getting “back to work”. The over-arching theme to this episode is about having "an unhealthy emotional attachment to physical objects that are not making your life better." His main reference point is a book (really, a chapter from it) by Peter Walsh called It's All Too Much: An Easy Plan for Living a Richer Life with Less Stuff. I'm no hoarder, but I'm guilty of keeping things I don't really need. I sense a theme for this year's spring cleaning.
Unrelated to the main theme: Merlin Mann throws out a one-liner I liked: "There are a lot of maxims that are impossible, but are a pretty good yard stick for deciding if you're going in the right direction." #
It's a simple concept, but one I didn't articulate on my site.
A musician is more likely to dream up new songs by strumming on the guitar than by writing notes on the page. A chef is more likely to invent a new recipe by trying a bold variation on an otherwise known formula - while actively preparing the invented dish, not while sitting in the park with a pen and a notepad. A painter, no doubt, benefits by investing some mental energy in deciding on subject or approach, but I think that the genius of Mona Lisa happened while standing at the canvas with paint.
Building isn't just for final decisions, it's also for arriving at better decisions. Don't just build to keep what's built; build to think, and build to answer questions.
I couldn't agree more. #
I know I'm late to this, but I have to note the passing of an amazing man. I thoroughly enjoyed both the book and HBO miniseries, “Band of Brothers”. In both instances, it held the men of Easy Company, and their eminent leader, Major Dick Winters as what helps symbolize America. If he truly was even a shadow of what the stories told, we could each grow by emulating this man. #
This article rings more true to me than most others I've read in a while.
"Discovery of structure in a chaotic world means less chaos, and while weâ€™re happy to make you laugh, the idea of a more orderly, structured, and knowable world is what drives us and keeps us warm in bed at night."
Steven Weinberger at George Mason University has created a speech accent archive, where he has recorded people from around the world reading the same paragraph. It's fascinating to click around and listen to a variety of accents (plus, click on the "search" function to see even more samples). I've already spent too much time doing this. My particular favorites directly from the map are the following samples: Russia, Australia, El Salvador, Edinburgh, UK, Oxfordshire, UK, Ivory Coast, North Carolina, <a href="http://accent.gmu.edu/searchsaa.php?function=detail&speakerid=107"Arkansas, Brooklyn, NY. #
“In contrast to ‘normal’ people, engineers have rational objectives for social interactions:
- Scott Adams in Dilbert Principle #
- Get it over with as soon as possible
- Avoid getting invited to something unpleasant
- Demonstrate mental superiority and mastery of all subjects.”
A perfectly illustrated relation between a sense of humor and drama. #