2006.09.22 Where it Counts
In the 5th grade I got in a fight with a kid named Chris Powers. I won't go into the details of our friendship obviously gone wrong. For whatever dumb reason, lately I've been thinking about a comment he made after the fight.
"You got me in my weak spot!"
"Well duh, that's why I won, and you lost."
I hadn't been in a fight before then, and I haven't really been in a fight since then. I'm not exactly a skilled fighter. My brother would call me a wimp since I didn't fight with my hands/fists, just my feet. He came out swinging, and I kicked him a couple times - never in the reserved location. Some friends of mine were there and they were throwing, what we called, Hot Beans(1) at him during the fight. The fight lasted all of 30 seconds or a minute. After deciding he was outmatched, he walked the block and half home crying. I taunted him while I followed him home.
I felt horrible about the fight. Sure, I had to act all macho about it so I could maintain what little street cred I had just gained. It didn't change the fact that I felt bad about it. He was crying, I obviously hurt him. What little was left of our friendship was now truly gone. I kept up a string of events that really could only amount to pure unkindness. One day, I gave him a wicked charlie-horse in his thigh outside the cafeteria. I continued to nag him, punch him in his arm, make him feel worse.
In theory this was all to make myself feel better. What better way to make myself feel better than to make him feel worse? Yeah, I agree - it's flawed logic. I don't really care about the psychology behind all of this. I was 10 years old. I've probably heard your explanation before. I want to return to what Chris said after I "beat him up".
"You got me in my weak spot!" Sure, we understand that in fighting, or in any situation where there is a winner and loser, that part of the strategy of the opposing team is to find and exploit your weakness. Sometimes it's just to perform your best, and outmatch your opponent. But inevitably, in order to be called the winner, your skills/abilities outmatched your opponent.
I had no idea that the side of his body where my left foot hit him was his weak spot. He seemed to think that my face was my weak spot, since that's what he kept swinging at.
If we keep that in mind though, isn't it true that as we succeed there is undoubtedly somebody out there that has to fail? They might not fail, but maybe they didn't succeed to the degree that we did. I'm not proposing that we go on a kick-fest of fury with 10 year old, immature, rage. I'm suggesting that in attempting to succeed in some situations that you seek the weakness of your "opponent" and take advantage of it.
What does this have to do with anything? Nothing at all. I was just amused all these years later that I "got [him] in [his] weak spot." Chris, if you're out there, and for some extremely whacked reason you're reading my blog, and this post - I'm sorry dude. I could still kick your @ss… literally.
(1) Hot Beans came from pods that we'd take off of a certain tree. They only became truly hot after you'd rub them quickly on the ground. They seemed to have quite the ability to hold their heat. I would imagine these would hurt if they were thrown at you, hot or not.