I read this article a while ago, and was initially thrown off by the title, and even the opening line. I proceeded to be completely drawn in by his message. Despite having read it months ago, I thought of it again recently, and figured I should share it.
In marriage, losing is letting go of the need to fix everything for your partner, listening to their darkest parts with a heart ache rather than a solution. It's being even more present in the painful moments than in the good times. It's finding ways to be humble and open, even when everything in you says that you're right and they are wrong. It's doing what is right and good for your spouse, even when big things need to be sacrificed, like a job, or a relationship, or an ego. It is forgiveness, quickly and voluntarily. It is eliminating anything from your life, even the things you love, if they are keeping you from attending, caring, and serving. It is seeking peace by accepting the healthy but crazy-making things about your partner because, you remember, those were the things you fell in love with in the first place. It is knowing that your spouse will never fully understand you, will never truly love you unconditionally—because they are a broken creature, too-and loving them to the end anyway.
It's a great article, and certainly has some pointers for how I could improve as a spouse. #
I, like many others, love this new typeface from Hoefler & Frere-Jones. As a person who doesn't design much these days (except for occasional things for myself), it's hard to justify the cost. I also love the sample pairings they show at the bottom of the page (and on the Features page). It's a bit too sleek/modern for the project I'm currently working on, but I would love to have this typeface as an option for an accent. #
I love rhubarb, but not to the point that I'd want to marry it. Okay, maybe I just really like rhubarb. No matter what, my hope is that by posting this here, it might just help these delicious-looking bars to appear in my home in the near future. Maybe warm. Maybe with a scoop of ice cream. Please? #
I love Ethan Marcotte/@beep's bukk.it. From what I can tell, it serves various purposes for him. Possibly the most entertaining purpose, is the image-only Twitter conversations he has he has with them, where those images play center stage. Completely inspired by this collection of images, a while ago I started collecting my own set of images. My collection is lots smaller than his, and seriously pales in comparison. Despite that, I wanted my collection to look better to the casual browser. With that in mind, I found this handy set of files, which does just what I wanted - list files, just in a way that looks nicer than the apache system default (and fittingly enough, mentions bukk.it (though not by name) as its base example of a file listing). I quickly put these files in place over at g.lbs.im. I added a couple pieces that would display the file size in a flexible way (in KB, MB, GB, etc), formats the date better, and also hides a couple system files that have to appear (thanks to my host). If you end up wanting those additions, I'm happy to share, just drop me a line. #
An interesting, extended example of her own regret on a tattoo, but how regret should impact the rest of us:
"If we have goals and dreams and we want to do our best, and if we love people and we don't want to hurt them or lose them, we should feel pain when things go wrong. The point isn’t to live without any regrets, the point is to not hate ourselves for having them… We need to learn to love the flawed, imperfect things that we create, and to forgive ourselves for creating them. Regret doesn't remind us that we did badly — it reminds us that we know we can do better."
Well said. #
Susan puts out there a couple points that rang true with me - put a stop the need for constant group work (it's okay at times, but it doesn't need to be the norm). Also, we should each take time to go to our own proverbial wilderness to have our own revelations, or deep thinking.
Personality-wise, I've tested as both an introvert and extrovert (and each time I felt like it described me well). With that in mind, Susan introduced a word to me which describes me well - ambivert. This somewhat temperamental existence doesn't always sit well with my extroverted friends or family members. I'm curious about Susan's fairly new book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking. I'll add it to my list of books to read or listen to. #
Seeing a picture/illustration of one of these brings back so many childhood memories. It's not the world's most impressive plane, nor is it even in service any more, but it's an amazing aircraft for how it contributed to my life. #
Mahatma Gandhi originally referred to these as "seven social sins", and later said this list contained "the seven blunders that human society commits, and that cause all violence."
- Wealth without work.
- Pleasure without conscience.
- Knowledge without character.
- Commerce without morality.
- Science without humanity.
- Worship without sacrifice.
- Politics without principles.
I'd love a nice letterpress print of these, hanging on my wall as a reminder. #
"Instead of sitting at your computer, and looking at books, go...and sit there. The way to get an interesting idea is to go to the source. Stay there until you have thought of something interesting about [it]. Then, listen to that idea and it will design itself." - Bob Gill #
Last week I finally watched this presentation by Bret Victor. Although he's not a very engaging presenter, his content is impeccable. I think the geeky demos are cool, and his personal modus operandi is interesting. Overall, the purpose of his presentation to find a guiding principal, or not to. You choose. #